Sunday, May 21, 2017

Sunday Confessions | 5-21-17

I Confess

Sometimes when I start to think about how amazing my life really is, I get worried that all the things that make it amazing will be taken away. Like I can't just enjoy it without worry. JUST BE GRATEFUL YOU DUMB B. Why bleed before you're wounded<== I just heard this on American Gods, I don't know if it's a real quote before that, I just never heard it before but I like it.

I Confess

I think I kind of figured out what my dream aesthetic for the house is: if World Market and the garden center from Lowes/Home Depot had a tiki rainbow botanical baby. But Neil's dream aesthetic is like Best Buy plus a cushy movie theater plus a toy store smashed together and had a monochromatic futuristic tech baby.

I Confess

I think two of my neighbors are working in tandem to see who can be the most psycho. If you saw my Instagram stories, the ones right next door to me started fighting at like 8 in the morning yesterday. I've said it before and I'll say it again, that is just too dang early to be that angry. Where do these people find the energy for that?

I guess he thinks she is cheating on him or something. They argued while she walked around the corner to her mom's house. The bitter side of me wonders where does this awful human get so many suitors, SHE IS THE WORST. But then I have to remember the quality of guys and they are nothing I want. BUT STILL. WHY GUYS, HAVE SOME SELF RESPECT. THIS IS FOR EVERYONE INVOLVED, INCLUDING YOU JACIE.

This is the link to our poor quality video of him breaking the car window, let me know if it doesn't work and I'll embed it. Just feeling lazy. I feel like at this point, she should get a punch card for window fixing, she would be like one punch away from a free window.

also, hold on, there's a BUG FAIR???? I NEED TO GO TO THIS.


  1. Okay, I loved this post. Hilarious! First of all, the description of what you and Neil's dream house aesthetic would each be, and also, another episode of "Heather's Neighborhood is Weird, Yo." Trademark, me, 2017. It will be a TV show. :D

    1. My husband says he wish he could back in time when we were thinking of buying this house and saying, nope, don't do it, ha. It's really only been like the past year that things have gotten weird!